Rita Banik, founder of RACE to Rein in Cancer has been living with cancer for more than 12 years. She reflects on her journey, the ups and downs and what keeps her going as the fear of relapse stays in the mind forever.
The milestones and key incidents that come to mind
- Detected the breast lump in March 2006
- Going for FNAC test was the hardest
- First reaction of relatives was that I was going to die
- The trauma of losing a breast came almost after a year of surgery
- First realization of what I had gone through came much later, maybe after the reconstruction surgery in 2009
- Relapse in 2013 was shocking. The cancer had affected the sternum. I didn’t talk to anyone for one week
- The whole ordeal of meeting one doctor after another, going for second and third opinions was awful
- The cost of injection that I had to take once a month was very high
- Relapse in 2017 for the second time was heart breaking. This time my lungs were affected.
- Again, the medication advised was beyond our pocket. May have to be taken after the next PETScan
- Fear of another relapse stays in mind forever
Rita Banik's initial journey with cancer
Life before and after cancer. What changed - physical, emotional, employment, social, etc.
Cancer has been in my life since so long that I have actually forgotten my pre-cancer life. Yes, I was fully active before cancer, enjoying, working hard, looking after my family, socialising the way everyone does.
When I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2006, I was shaken, but I took the treatment boldly. Even before my treatment was over, I started sharing my thoughts on a public platform, attended support group meetings. In 2009 I actually started attending national and international conferences and workshops.
I didn’t feel much difference in myself personally but people did make me feel different. Now I do not hesitate shopping for the small things that I didn’t do before cancer. Where pre-cancer I would hold grudges against people for small issues, post-cancer I stopped doing that. I also started writing a book, reading more about cancer and helping those in need in whatever ways I could. I travelled a lot to give presentations. In 2012 I started the Charitable Trust ‘RACE to rein-in-cancer’.
My employment was always dependent on my husband’s job so kept on changing according to the places and circumstances. But after starting RACE I have received a permanent work which can be handled from anywhere.
How does life change each time the cancer returns? Would you like to share the emotional turmoil after metastasis?
Life has definitely changed a lot in past couple of years. First time the relapse was shocking but my health remained good with the monthly injections. I continued my job, physical activity and socialised like always. There were low moments but on the whole, my hands were full with goals and deadlines.
Since past one year i.e. 2017, after second relapse, my stamina has gone down. Initially I did go into depression very often but because of my family support I have been able to come out of it. The high rising expense of medication still remains a big issue. Fear of another relapse or another round of chemo also adds to the emotional turmoil.
What does metastatic cancer mean?
What stayed the same?
The zeal to achieve the best in all spheres of life remains unchanged. My interest in reading, writing, traveling, laughing and enjoying with friends remains the same.
We all have a perception about a cancer journey. What surprised you about the experience at each stage?
My initial perception of cancer treatment was that it wasn’t such a big deal. Once the treatment was over, life would be the same as it had always been. But it didn’t happen that way. I also became involved in cancer activities and that changed my attitude towards everything completely.
How do you cope with fear and anxiety?
I have been very active physically as in going for long walks, enjoying nature, going to sea side, doing yoga, swimming – all this along with the work for RACE, that keeps me occupied a lot. Recently I have joined Buddhism so I chant, attend meetings. My anxiety towards my disease has given way to faith that I will overcome it no matter what.
Complete the phrase
Motto - to maintain passion for RACE in myself and our teammates
Strangest comment - oh one can’t make out that you have undergone treatment for breast cancer
I fear another relapse and another chemo
Best gift was the trip to Moscow by my family for my birthday in August and my visit to my university and hostel
My biggest support is my family and friends
Annoying moment when someone says that they can CURE cancer by eating certain fruit, etc
I love outdoor activities especially swimming
I hate sitting idle
