Caregiver burnout is very common amongst caregivers of dementia and respite care options are limited. Caregivers are sometimes reluctant to ask for help. How can you create a team of family and friends to support you? What are the things you can ask help for?
ASK FOR HELP
ASK FOR HELP
You think you can handle it all, and you probably can but at what price? Stop trying to be superhuman and ask for help! When things get difficult you MUST reach out to your family, friends or community support groups. Having someone come in and sit with your loved one for a few hours every day or week helps greatly! Caregivers who take regular time away are better carers and find more satisfaction in their role as caregivers.
Creating a support team is a
Creating a support team is a worthwhile investment of time and energy. Some caregivers give up when people don't understand or believe the challenges, or when someone says, "but why do you need support, everyone cares for elders." But a support team can make a lot of difference. Some suggestions: (1) begin this process early, so that the support is available as the dementia progresses (2) to explain the situation and how they can help, use a combination of authoritative material and real-life stories of others along with anything specific to your situation (3) when asking someone for help, keep the personality and characteristics in mind. Everyone has their own problems, so don't expect something that is a stretch or imposition for them (4) keep in touch and give them updates so that they remain involved and supportive (5) show appreciation for their support (6) if someone becomes critical, don't get upset. Try to understand their view. If they stop supporting, don't get stressed.
For specific areas where you
For specific areas where you can ask for help, think about what the person may need to learn to provide that support, and what is easier for the person helping you to do given their personality, skills, daily routine, etc. Some people are uncomfortable interacting with someone with behavior changes, or may not be good at actual care tasks. Some may find it difficult to grasp dementia concepts or remember various communication tips. So maybe they cannot help in actual care tasks or spend time with the person with dementia. But there are many other ways they can help, such as doing outside tasks, doing chores, or just being there as "fun" company for the caregivers. The page http://dementiacarenotes.in/caregivers/how-relatives-friends-colleagues… has a discussion on this, along with many examples.
It sometimes does require a
It sometimes does require a little effort to think of what chores, tasks can I ask someone else to do. Can I ask my kids to help out? My spouse to help out? And also decide what need not be as perfect as I would like. Can I cook fewer times in a day? Can a friend pick up my kid? So important to prioritise.
Caregiver burnout can be the
Caregiver burnout can be the result of various issues and sometimes not necessarily directly related to the daily hands on caregiving. It could be in addition to emotional and physical reactions, include changes in roles, family conflicts, financial & other responsibilities etc. To start, identifying them and addressing it is the first step to lessen the burnout. As for asking help from friends & families, caregivers often hesitate. And, that is because the long established roles, responsibilities and mutual expectations within the family play an important part. It is quite normal for a caregiver to refuse help, but research has shown that those who do look for help and have support of others, manage the care more successfully. So, to create a team, one has to identify people who are close, known to them well. Types of help varies in each family, but remembering these points will be useful- not making too many demands, picking the right person for the job and avoid criticizing them.