Rachna*, 39 from Mumbai shares her journey with migraine and how the fear of managing migraine attacks with a small new born baby led to post partum depression and her attempts to find solutions that work.
Symtoms and Diagnosis:
I was diagnosed with Migraine 10 years ago, soon after my wedding. The first time, I remember being at home; it was mid morning. There was sudden onset of acidity and aching in my head. A few hours later, I was vomiting. I called my husband and that evening after he returned from work, he took me to the local GP, who prescribed Ondem (anti-vomiting), Pantoprazole (antacid) and Naproxen (NSAID- painkiller). The migraine subsided after 24 hours. There was a lull of about 6 months before a second attack, but then the frequency increased to once every 3 months to then once a month. Since a year now, it occurs almost every other day. On most occasions, it will last for 24 hours. It starts with pain behind the eyes and then moves towards the back of the head, it is always bilateral and accompanied by facial swelling especially around my eyes and light sensitivity. The intensity of pain starts from 1 and gradually increases to 7 and certain times even 9. On those occasions, I can barely lift my head and I have to take the Rizanet 10mg right away before I resort to naproxen. Rizanet is a dissolvable strip that melts in your mouth and is a prescription medicine to help relieve acute migraine pain.
Must read: How to Treat Migraine Induced Nausea/Vomiting
Medical and Family History :
My emotional imbalance may be attributed to all the hormonal injections I took while trying to conceive; I had 4 cycles of IUI (intrauterine Insemination), a fertility treatment procedure. Even then, I used to worry about how once I get pregnant and deliver, who will take care of my baby on days that I have migraines. I think it all proceeded into a downward spiral after the delivery of my son. He was unable to latch properly to feed and the maternity ward nurses were not very kind and sympathetic to that. Their harsh attitude caused more distress and anxiety. My newborn would cry all night and spit out milk after every feed, so my anxiety levels kept building up.
Related Reading: Breastfeeding Has Been My Toughest Journey
Psychological effect of Migraine
That is when I first went to see a Psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with Postpartum Depression and prescribed Serta 100mg. That was 7 years ago. That drug has kept me going even till this day. My psychiatrist has reduced my dosage over the years to 25mg and wants to completely wean me off it. However, I have developed such dependency on the drug that the thought of not being on it seems unbearable. So every time, he mentions weaning it off, it brings on so much worry that it triggers a headache. Seeing this pattern of behaviour, my psychiatrist has referred me to see a counsellor for at least the next 2 years who can help me deal with it better.
I have met the counsellor once so far for a session. According to her, I overanalyse every situation which leads to over thinking and then worry and ultimately a headache. To get me started she has suggested a few techniques:
- Avoid eye contact since that is what I tend to over-analyse, people’s intention during conversations and such.
- Count your blessings which essentially means to be grateful for the good things in life
I have had constipation since childhood. In fact, my psychiatrist pointed out that constipation can cause anger and frustration in patients and have lifelong consequences on physical and mental health.
My mother used to get migraines occasionally but nothing as frequent as mine. Both my father and sister have Anxiety disorder.
Migraine Triggers :
My migraine triggers are 90% due to stress and 10% due to other factors like harsh sun exposure, certain food intake, smell of paint, dust mites.
Stress to me can incur from small challenges in everyday life. For instance, any change or break in daily routine or an argument with someone will invite nervous tension. Bingeing or eating heavy meals leads to acidity which again triggers migraines for me. I have noticed that certain foods such as radish, rasam (sour Indian soup), thali peeth (multigrain pancake), amti (Maharashtrian lentil dal) and Chinese cuisine almost definitely lead to migraines.
Managing My Migraine:
Exercise :
I make sure I go for a walk almost every morning before it gets too sunny. So as soon as I drop off my son to his school bus, I head for the garden. This has been my routine since several years now. Since the past 3 months, I have joined a Yoga class, so pranayam happens 3 times a week.
Diet :
When I was on a higher Serta dose, I had gained a lot of weight (I had reached 74kilos) due to increased appetite which is one of its side-effects. I used also be very drowsy, so it was a bad combo of eating too much and sleeping too much. Around 4 years ago, I consulted a Dietician who advised portion control of all my meals and reduced carbohydrate intake. So I now have only one roti or a bowl of rice with lunch and dinner. I vehemently avoid all outside foods and have over the years stopped my alcohol intake completely. I also follow certain tenements of the Dattatreya book by Swami Samarth, namely avoidance of garlic and onion during chaturmas (6 months of the year) and not eating at restaurants or anyone else’s house.
I do need to drink more water and many days I will forget to get enough hydration.
Support from family and friends:
The major support has come from my husband who is a very calm and patient person. Generally, he is quite lazy but the days I have severe migraines, he will do everything round the house. He also points out my mistakes (causes that may have triggered my headaches) and makes me realise that I should avoid them next time. Sometimes, i feel that my entire personality has changed. My friends tell me they can recognise I have a migraine from even a text message of mine.
Learnings From My Experience
My Biggest challenge is taking sole responsibility of anything, which means that if I am the only person tasked with a job, I start to falter. I need a back-up or someone partnering me through it all.
I have come to terms with what I can and cannot do and arrived at a state of content. That for me stabilises life because any imbalance again causes too much rife in my mindset. So I have no future worries as of now.
My advice to others who may be facing issues affecting their mental health is that they should seek Psychiatric help right away. During acute situations, it is best to start allopathy and then one can move on to make lifestyle changes or try alternative therapies. I myself started Homeopathy just a few months ago and do yoga religiously but medications and now counselling have been my backbone for thriving all these years. Although my migraines may never completely subside, all these interventions have helped subside the intensity of pain and given me more confidence to deal with them.
I know I make mistakes everyday but I need to make continual efforts to not repeat them. Life is all about the effort you put in on a daily basis. Self–help is essential!
*Name changed on request
