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Submitted by RitikaRaotole on 5 October 2020
A teenager, a lymphoblastic leukemia survivor in a white dress and headcover

Ritika Raotale, a teenager from Surat, relates her agonising treatment for lymphoblastic lymphoma, a fast-growing aggressive cancer, and her tale of triumph over the disease with high dose chemotherapy and a smile.

Before my diagnosis in 2019, I was leading a fairly normal life. I had just finished my Class 12 Board Exams. I had gone to my Nani’s house for a short break and enjoying my vacation. There one night I suddenly began having difficulty breathing. It was as if something was choking me. As if a small ball was stuck in my throat. Maybe it is some foodstuff, I thought and gulped down a glass of water. But I did not get any relief. The feeling of suffocation continued.

The next day I returned home and visited my family doctor. He gave me some medicines, but even then the choking sensation persisted. I could barely eat and what was more painful was drinking water. I kept feeling something really big was stuck in my throat. Even when I was just sitting still, the uneasy feeling would trouble me. Two days later, I developed a severe cough and began feeling acute pressure on my left hand and my chest. Almost as if someone has kept something heavy on it.

When my problems increased, we visited another doctor. I told him I was getting a continuous choking sensation, cough and pressure on my chest. He advised a blood test and X-ray. The result indicated some abnormality in my chest region.

Problems with CT scan

I also had to get a CT scan done. It was for the first time in my life I was getting a CT scan. I didn’t realise that with my breathing problem, getting a simple scan would become nightmarish. Firstly, I could not lie down absolutely flat because of the choking sensation, and my relentless cough. I would break out into a severe cough every time I made an attempt to lie down. Also, you have to stop your breath for a minute during the scan. I was coughing so much that I was unable to hold my breath. When the doctor saw me struggling, he asked my father to clasp my nose and close my mouth for a second. Believe me that second was most dreadful for me. I was squirming and struggling. All I could think of was what a fish feels like when taken out of water. I couldn’t do anything. I could see the pained expression on my father’s face. Finally, my CT scan was performed.

Thymus gland cancerous

In the evening when my mother called up for the results, she was told there was a tumour in the chest. When we heard it was a tumour, the worst thoughts began crossing my mind. The atmosphere at home had become quite sullen and dismal. My uncles and aunts suddenly started visiting us. They would be discussing something in very serious and subdued tones. But every time I would enter the room, they would all become silent. I was yet to grasp the full gravity of the situation.

Treatment in Mumbai

Then one night my mother said we have to go to Mumbai for my treatment. I was admitted to Tata Memorial Hospital. The first day, when I was wheeled into the room, I was psyched out by the sights and sounds around me. The hospital waiting rooms and corridors were packed with patients of all age groups accompanied by their anxious families. I felt they were all looking at me with pity. My eyes suddenly welled up and tears began streaming down. I felt I was entering another zone, another life.

My health was getting worse. The coughing had not improved at all. The pressure and heaviness had increased. Now I could feel it on my back and neck as well.

The tests at Tata Memorial revealed that I had anterior mediastinal mass lesion consistent with T-Cell Lymphoblastic Lymphoma (T-LBL). That was a mouthful for me. All I could gather was that my treatment would consist of many, many rounds of chemotherapy but no surgery as the tumour was delicately located near my lungs making operation difficult.

Start of chemotherapy

My first dose of chemo began, to my horror, at three o’clock at night. The nurse came and woke me up and said: “Ritika, wake up. It is time for chemo.” I was in deep sleep and woke up suddenly in a state of shock. Anyway it was a small chemo. After the chemo my taste buds became very bitter. In the next 15 days, I was given another five small chemos.

When my high dose final protocol started, the side effects were quite acute. Besides fatigue and vomiting, I also developed mouth ulcers. My mouth had become so sore and painful that I felt as if small firecrackers were bursting in my mouth. I could eat nothing. Even saliva in my mouth used to hurt. I also had severe constipation for which I had to take enema multiple times. I had become extremely weak. I could not sit, walk, bathe on my own. I couldn’t wear my own clothes. Sometimes the side effects were so severe, that they had to postpone the chemo cycle.

My nerves had started becoming thin. The doctor recommended that before the nerves become invisible, I should get a PICC (peripherally inserted central catheter). The surgery for the PICC hurt a lot. I couldn’t move my hand for 15 days. During this time, I had also developed thrombosis on my left hand. This started another set of treatment. I was given injections twice a day for it.

Spinal injections

However, the most painful of all the injections of my entire treatment were those in the spine. Because of the risk of cancer spreading to the brain and spinal cord, a chemo drug is also given into the spinal fluid. This used to given to me in the lower spine every seven days in the operation theatre without any anaesthesia with a thick needle. It continued right through the treatment and I got nearly 20 injections in the spine. It gives me goosebumps when I think of it.

In all, I think I must have received over 600 injections in seven months for my treatment.

Hair loss

Another disturbing side effect of chemotherapy was my hair loss. I had waist length, shiny silky hair. Whoever saw it would always appreciate it. I too took great care of it. Once my chemo started, I began losing clumps of hair. My pillow, blanket and sheets would be covered with my hair. I hated the sight. Finally, my mother said to cut my hair. I chopped it to shoulder length. Then one day when I was admitted, the nurse advised that it would be better if I shave off my hair because it was falling everywhere. The next day, the assistant came with a trimmer. They woke me up at seven in the morning. The moment the trimmer with the buzzing sound came near me, I began to shiver and perspire. And every time she ran the trimmer on my scalp, I felt my neck was being chopped. My mother was with me. She could not even see it happening.

After Cancer Treatment

On August 20, 2019 I was told that the cancer had responded to the treatment. Right now my maintenance period continues. I have to take drugs for oral chemos. The side effects are minimal compared to what I had gone through earlier. Now there is only weakness, fatigue. The rest is fine. My family was there with me right through. They gave me the strength and love to face the ordeal. If the family is there with you, your journey becomes a lot easier.

 

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