Sonal Goregaonkar suffered a stroke while climbing the Everest base camp, which took away her ability to speak, a condition known as Global Aphasia. This is a story of her grit and determination to regain a normal life and get back to work based on a video interview with her.
I am Sonal Goregaonkar. I am a loveable soul. My family and friends describe me as an understanding, caring person and an ambitious person. My key pillars of my stroke recovery was my faith in myself, my faith in my Buddhist practice and my close knit friend circle and my family.
Listen to Sonal speak: My recovery from Global Aphasia after Stroke
Circumstances leading to the stroke
I was climbing the Everest base camp, it was my goal to achieve that. I had trained myself for that. I had done my trekking journey within India. I was fully prepared for that. On the last leg of my trek, I fell down on my backside. I was in terrible pain. I was unable to get up. At night, the lady at the hotel applied balm on my backside. I spoke with my friend also who was there. I said I was not able to do anything. I wanted to go to the hospital just then. I was at 4000 ft above sea level. No phone connections were available. Somehow my friend managed to call for the helicopter on the satellite phone. In the morning the helicopter came. I took 22 hrs to get to the hospital. By then, my brain was damaged. And I was in coma. I was unconscious at that point.
History of heart issues or symptoms
I was fully fit. No history or symptom whatsoever. I was working out, going to gym daily, eating healthy, I never consumed any alcohol or smoked cigarettes. Maybe it was the combination of the altitude and the stress at work and at home.
Hospital experience
I was unconscious for about 6 to 7 days. I came back to Bombay, I was in Kathmandu for 3 days. My family later flew me down to Bombay. I was in Hinduja hospital in Bombay for about 10 days. I was unconscious for about 7 days. When I got up I was not able to walk. My right side was affected. I started my physiotherapy, speech therapy at the hospital. And I came home after 15 days. My body was paralysed and speech was severely affected. These were my main issues.
Rehabilitation and Recovery experience
After about 10 days in the hospital and the initial therapy, I started walking on my own without any support. But my speech was affected. My doctors told me one part of my language area was affected, so called dead. So I was unable to speak. I had no words to describe anything. I was like a baby. My condition was called Global Aphasia. I was unable to read or write or spell. I was unable to communicate with anyone. I had the emotions in me, but I was unable to express it. It was a very hard time for me. I can’t describe, but it was very hard for me. For any human being, speech is imperative. No one can survive without any mode of communication. I had the emotions but I was unable to express them.
How I worked on my Aphasia
It was really a lot of hard work. Fortunately I was living in Bombay where the medical facilities were good. I went to a good hospital where speech therapists were very good. My first therapist told me that I can speak again, but it will take time. That reinstated confidence in me. I was hopeful again. But he told me my language part was dead. But I can cover up from other organs. So I started thinking, other organs meant, other neural connections or wiring that connect from brain to speech. I thought it is a good way to at least communicate. So I tried hard.
My first interaction with him was seeing the pictures and recognising the pictures and calling out the names of the pictures. That was my first lesson. Eventually I started reading out the alphabets, A,B,C,D. Gradually I was able to form the sentences. I started with small words, then moved to big words, and then forming the sentences. Later I started forming the paragraphs. That was my journey on the speech part. It was hell for me. But I tried every single thing that would work for me. I started reading loudly, my therapist asked me to do read loudly every single hour. So that the brain connection will form. Also making puzzles on my own. Also playing cards. Also solving maths problems. So that my brain would be activated. So I did many things for my speech.
Emotional challenges of this difficult journey
Frankly speaking, after 3 months I got to know what exactly happened to me. No one told me in between. I was not able to comprehend what had happened to me. I was in some other world. I thought I will come back and work again. I thought it was a phase in my life. I was working. Doing my chores, like before. Just that my speech was affected. I thought it was a phase. After 3 months, on my 3rd or 4th visit to doctor, the doctor explained the issue to me. I wanted to know what is the timeline for the recovery. She said the speech part will take time. You can practice and practice. It will come back, but after how long we cannot say. I was shocked, and then confused. I couldn’t understand what the doctor meant. Later in the rehab centre, I started crying, first time every after my stroke happened, and I continued crying for one week. I felt my entire world had changed.
I was working in a large organisation as recruiter where I was handling international plus domestic hiring. And suddenly I could not speak. My work involved only speaking. I was devastated. I felt my whole identity had shifted in a sense. It took a toll on my entire family. Also for my son. He could not understand what had happened to mama. He was 11 then, on the verge of turning into a teenager. He was unable to comprehend anything. I was taking medicine for .... depression. Later I realised I could be addicted by that. I said to myself If I want to come back to my life, I want to work again, I can’t take this kind of medicine. So I told myself it is my will power, my strong determination to overcome that. So I did that also.
Family’s role
My family consists of my mother, mother in law, my sister in law. They cared for me. They were my guardian angels. Even my father. My friends were always there for me. Even now they are there. It has been 4 years, but they never left me alone. They are my backbone. Even my organisation took care of me. Immediately after my stroke, they flew me down to Bombay, and they took everything in their hands. My parents were not able to understand what had happened to me. My friends and my work colleagues were there for me. And I had built an ecosystem for myself before the stroke happened. Because I had built a relationship with them already. So it was my blessing.
Preparation for joining work again
I was working in my organisation till 2019 but I was unable to do the work as I had been doing earlier. So I was in my mind not doing the right thing. I was not contributing really. I told my boss that I need to leave as I was not putting anything on the table. Once I train myself to speak, work on my speech part, then I can come back. My boss asked me not to leave. I was confused but I decided to leave because I felt that was the right thing to do. Two years I worked on my speech, I started reading loudly. I started conversing with other people. One thing that mattered to me I needed to connect with different kinds of people. Earlier I was connecting only my friends, my family members. But I needed to connect with other people so that I will understand what I am lacking in, so that I can improve my speech more. So I was calling people for any work. I was able to clearly make progress.
Key life decisions that stroke impacted
I have changed my thinking. Earlier I was worried about what others might think about me. Today I do not think. I love myself today. I feel if I do not love myself, I cannot give love to others. So I started loving myself so that I can love others now, I can see the progress happening.
Other cognitive complications of stroke
I was able to make connections, but my brain functioning was slow, compared to what it was earlier. Today it is faster. But 4 years back I was unable to think and talk. I was like a dummy in that sense. Eventually it came back, but it took time. It was like relearning reading and writing. I can give you an analogy. It is like a pearl of strings. If you want to string a necklace, the centre pearl would be bigger, and there would be smaller pearls would be further down the string. Similarly appropriate words need to be aligned with the sentence formation.
Regrets on delayed access to a stroke ready hospital
Initially I did have regrets. But later, in hindsight, I felt, it was destined. I can’t change what happened. But I can change my future, I can change my Karma. Today I believe in Karma. Now I realise the effect of Karma. Today the words, actions and thoughts matter to me. I can change my future now.
Motivation about spreading awareness about stroke
My biggest motivation is my inner self. If you want to change your struggle or circumstances, you can do it. What is required is the inner will power. It is hard, I know it. I have been there, and I know it very well. But if you want to change your circumstances, you can change it. That is my message to stroke survivors.
We would also like to thank Stroke Support India for connecting us to Sonal Goregaonkar.
