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Submitted by Sushmita G Kar on 31 August 2020

Ashu, 23, a nonverbal grandson with autism, bonds with his 83-year-old grandfather miles away during Covid-19 lockdown, through pictures, videos and daily zoom breakfast sessions. Sushmita Kar, Ashu’s mom and Dadu's daughter, gives a heartfelt account.

Few months back, the days were so beautiful. There was no fear of people, or anxiety about going anywhere. The sun looked like one in fairy tales unfolding in a golden hue.

Like everyone else, our plans and prayers were laid out on the eve of year 2020. Dadu and Ashu were both gearing up for an upcoming overseas trip.

Ashu – 23, a nonverbal young adult with autism, and Dadu – 83, battling forgetfulness. However, not a day goes by when Ashu and Dadu have not thought of each other. Probably it's the result of having them as best friends forever. The feeling of being protected, loved, pampered and indulged as if they were born to be treated like that by each other. Both standing tall at 6’2”.

Pandemic happens

And, then the pandemic came along. Nothing seemed right. The uncertainty of it all. Extensions of timelines indefinitely. Each stuck miles apart, in the confines of four walls. Freedom totally curbed. Living in fear of people is perhaps the worst of the kind, even if it is for the greater good.

But, we as humans, learn to adapt, live on in our hopes, traditions and joys of celebration of everyday moments, even when our basic liberty has been restrained.

Video calling in pre-Covid days was once a week on Sunday afternoon with Ashu and Dadu discussing their lunch menus, one via typing and the other via rapid prompting. A lot of preparation needed to be done on both sides. Cut to present day scenario. Google Hangouts is the new snakes & ladders! Every single day, since last week of March, there have been interactions. Festivals being celebrated over zoom, even breakfasts shared. In no time, word spread around in the extended family and more requests to join in the daily breakfast session started to pour in from family all across the globe.

Google links

While on one of our online breakfast sessions, upon seeing me perturbed about how Ashu would be constructively spending his time at home so his learning is not halted during the lockdown and beyond, Dadu suggested Ashu to start clicking pictures and videos around the house and send him. That way Dadu would be able to see all the little changes Ashu keeps doing in his room. Dadu has always strongly believed that, when you guide your grandchildren through each small step and encourage their attempts (even if they are off the mark at times) you are building their internal sense of self and that is a gift of a lifetime.

Dadu all along has been an ardent nature lover and moonlighted as a photographer, back in the day mainly helping out friends and family create portfolios for flower shows and all. That was never a commercial venture though, more like a hobby. Ashu, being a visual learner, has been fascinated by the numerous photo albums in Dadu’s house. Even as a child he would sit with them for hours together, turning those vintage black pages over and over again. And, Ashu was the only person that was allowed in that tiny room filled with those fat photo albums neatly stacked on endless racks. Such has been the bond, Ashu and Dadu. Sublime blend, magically woven.

Bond over Photography

Around the same time, as if the universe conspired to bring all energies into sync, a fellow crusader, friend, founder of The Art Sanctuary (http://www.theartsanctuary.org), Shalini Gupta, who has been working relentlessly to bring about a mindset of transformation for neurodiverse adults by providing a platform for Skills Advancement, made an announcement about an online Workshop on Photography using smartphone.  This 3 weeks workshop was being conducted by Samar Jodha (https://www.redballoonglobal.com), a world renowned photographer with a gamut of experience.

Grabbing the opportunity, I enrolled Ashu. From there on, we embarked on a new journey with Ashu. The learnings and sharings from the workshop with Samar have been precious and beautiful for Ashu. He is learning how every picture has a story to tell. Every picture has an emotion and is unique. Dadu started getting his WhatsApp and heart full of pictures and stories from Ashu’s world. And thrilled he was beyond words.

New world of communication

The zoom breakfast sessions soon became photographs exchanging sessions. Dadu too was motivated to pick up his phone and click away, at times giving valuable tips to Ashu. This brought about a world of change in both as they relished in the process. The workshops not only opened up a whole new world of exploration for Ashu, but also a big revelation for us in terms of his readiness and willingness to start off something new. Being a tactile and visual person this seemed to have opened up a whole new world of communication as well as a sense of belonging for him.

Then followed a more technical approach to learning. Currently attending online course conducted by Mohit Ahuja (https://www.knowdisability.org/ourheroes), under the umbrella of The Art Sanctuary (http://www.theartsanctuary.org), to further explore the technical aspects of lighting and composition.

Dadu continues to be fully involved in the process, enabling Ashu the opportunity to learn to do something and feel the sense of accomplishment and pride when he gets it! Ashu’s learning programme evolves as he further unravels colours, textures and forms in a whole new way of capturing the essence of moments. This is enriching his artistic experience as well.

Ashu and Dadu honouring each other, each day celebrating every moment as a gift, as a blessing and as an opportunity to be the light that they are meant to be in this world. Helping each other find his place in the sun.

 
Anshuman Kar : A young Adult living with Autism. Awesome Artist Ashu is a true blue super hero. Overcoming challenges on every level, he is a recognized Outsider Artist with prestigious exhibitions under his belt.

Sushmita Kar : Ashu's mom, dreaming that some day soon my boy and everyone else like him will live and enjoy in a world where they will be accepted, appreciated and celebrated despite their differences. 

They live in Beautiful Bangalore, India. Come,.enter Ashu's world of Visual Conectedness via his Instagram Handle https://www.instagram.com/p/CEYIDCdhhIx/?igshid=sajqzam1562f
All photographs are copyrighted ©)

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