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Submitted by Anupama Bakshi on 11 May 2019
A collage of pictures of Nikita with autism mom Anupama Bakhshi and her brother Pranav

Not all superheroes wear capes! Nikita Bakhshi appreciates her mother Anupama, not only for all that she has done for her brother, Pranav who is on the autism spectrum but also for the unconditional love she shares with her daughter. A Mother’s Day special!

Mother’s Day, or let me say ‘I will post a picture with a long caption day’ – Hold your horses. I’m not saying that’s wrong, I very often post pictures with my mom on my instagram too and shower her with instagram PDA, nobody deserved it better than her! I read articles that have been doing rounds recently on the internet ,about how social media has ruined Mother’s Day and so have gift shops, by commercializing it. True, but why not?

The debate argues - why must our mothers only be acknowledged on this particular day, as the efforts and sacrifices they have made for us can’t possibly be rewarded through a mere day being observed. True! Growing up with a sibling with autism taught me a lot about being grateful for the little things in life. My mother always made sure that my needs were met by sacrificing hers. She has worked tremendously hard with my brother, who has now turned out to be fairly able and a kind young man. Some days I look at my mother’s schedule, and wonder how on earth she could get every single task done. When I say “I don’t know how she does it”, I mean to say - Not all superheroes wear capes!

Her patience and strength can move mountains, and just a humble brag- she’s done an excellent job raising her kids! The journey has been anything but smooth. Some days her progress with my brother was rewarding,and some days heartbreaking. I have seen her facing challenges after challenges and still have the courage to fight for her kids to have a normal life. She juggled a demanding job, my brother’s challenges, my well-being, and ensuring that she makes my brother capable enough so it’s not hard for me after her.

She is an avid advocate for autism and through this journey made me resilient. I’ve had days where I was miserable and confused, failing to understand why my brother would randomly hit me and not wear my rakhi on his wrist. I’ve felt helpless when strangers gave him judgemental and dirty stares if he had a meltdown in a supermarket. Through such days, she always made me mindful about one thing- It’s ‘his autism’, not him. Not to forget, we’ve had bad days when my teen angst just wanted ‘independence’. There are days when the ‘adult’ in me finds her care calls overbearing. (Sorry mom!) We have different opinions, difficult conversations and clashing views, but she always taught me to follow my heart and gave me independence to be ‘me’, and not just her daughter.

For all times I didn’t say but should have..thank you mom. I am proud of you every single day. I appreciate the unconditional love that you shower not only on us, but on the entire world, as it were. Thank you for being the wind beneath my wings, especially during the dark days. I’m proud to be your daughter, and I can only wish that I could be 0.5% as amazing as you are when I have kids. I love you more than life mom, just please don’t call my friends if I don’t pick your call! Ha ha !!!

To all single moms, foster moms, adoptive moms, mother figures, fathers playing the role of a mother, stepmoms and mothers of special needs children. Keep blessing the world by taking the challenges you are given and shining brightly for all of us to see.

 
Pranav added:
 
Maa is adorable and loving. She always wants me to enjoy life and let’s me do things I like. Maa helps me with studies and takes so much care of me. I love you
 
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