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Submitted by Anita Pradeep on 30 July 2020

Brian is a 26 year old man on the autism spectrum who misses his friends during the Covid-19 lockdown.  He uses technology to stay in touch and hopes for a lime juice party. His mother Anita Pradeep shares his experience.

From a little child who loved to sit by himself and play with either a Pepsi can or a toy car or a Scooby doo or Ninja turtle figurines, Brian over the years graduated to playing with his brother and cousins and with a little initiation from our side would agree to play with friends too.. Since autism has always been recognized as a condition which was primarily identified with a lack of social and communication skills, we focused a lot on facilitating Brian’s interaction with peers, family, extended families and friends.

L to R: Sameer, Sooraj, Anita, Sidhu,Sivaa and Brian 

Even as he transitioned from a teenager to a 26 year old adult, Brian turned out to be a people’s person with all the interaction .. So much that sometimes I wondered if I overdid it. Brian loves meeting people.. and he would ask their names and which place they are from.. After two or three meeting with the same person he would then go a little more deeper with curiosity and if it’s a Christian name he would ask which church and the name of the Vicar. He always looked forward to going to college, meeting his teachers and friends, talking to the autochetans or the uber drivers , weekend vocational training classes of Autism club and Imutsa where he has another set of friends, my neighbours, friends from our Church parish. He knows them all, their names, their address, and more..

Brian with Basil

And then came Covid-19 pandemic and everything came to an abrupt standstill. It was more than what he could take. The first week was really difficult with us constantly trying to explain to him why he couldn’t go out and that we had to stay home and be safe. He missed the rides, he missed talking to people, he missed saying hello and striking a conversation with neighbours in the lift or strangers in the metro or even while taking a walk on the road and he missed his friends Basil, Sid, Sameer, Sooraj, Sivaa and Sidhu the most.

Pradeep (Brian’s dad) took him out for rides to show him what the lockdown was and he got to see it himself. Then Rohit and Sharon would skype and talk to him and explain. Gradually he understood. Initially there were anxious moments as he couldn’t stand being cooped up at home even though we had involved him in a few activities to see that he was meaningfully engaged.

Since we knew he was missing everyone, we decided to skype or whatsapp video calls with family and friends. He was very happy seeing them while talking to them and so after that it was only video calls. He would decide whom to call and who he wanted to talk with. So we made a list and he got to see his friends and cousins, uncles and aunties. He has a list of friends whom he wants to invite home and serve lime juice that he learnt to make during the lockdown. He is very fond of Sijo who is his friend in College and he even wanted to shift to a hostel thinking he would get to see him. We did WhatsApp video calls to Seema and Preetha and Priti so that he could see his little friends. Last week he asked me to call my friend Ancy and requested her to arrange a zoom meeting so that he could meet his teachers and friends.

Thanks to the lockdown, now he is more tech savvy than me and knows what all is possible during the lockdown. Everyday he prays for Corona to go away and that the lockdown would be lifted. This has been stretched too far and hoping and praying the situation changes. Thanks to technology, am glad and happy he can stay connected with his friends and see them and talk to them.

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